DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: My sister always says she picked out my first girlfriend. In reality I crushed on the girl for weeks before I finally got up the nerve to ask her out. We went together all through high school and fizzled by the second year of college.
But she was “the one” for me, my sister always says, and she is dead certain someday we will end up together, happily ever after and all that. I really did love her once, but there was no way it was going to last and an even bigger no way it will ever happen for us again.
So ever since the breakup, my sister has been a real b
ch to anyone I have brought home to meet the family.
Now I am with someone I am thinking of asking to marry me. She makes me happier than anyone I have ever been with. So naturally my sister hates her most of any woman I introduced to our family and she is cold and nasty to her if I am stupid enough to let the two be together.
My girlfriend knows the story and lets it roll off her most of the time, but it gets to me for her sake and mine.
How do I get my sister to back the f
k off for good and let me pick my own wife? — SHE NEEDS TO GET OVER IT
DEAR SHE NEEDS TO GET OVER IT: Minus the cussing, I think the best way to let your sister know you’re not intimidated by her hassling you or the woman in your life is to tell her in no uncertain terms she’s way over the line and beyond out of bounds in trying to force you to follow her wishes to live in some fantasy she’s still clinging to long after it’s run its course.
It sounds to me as if she’s allowing her pride and overconfidence in her own judgment to blind her to what makes you truly happy. And her behavior is far from mature for an adult.
It’s your life, your choice, your decision.
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